So, my regular readers know I am on the road for work so frequently, sometimes at home I wake up in the middle of the night and try to figure out what hotel it is. There is an upside to travel, and that is working with great people like the folks in the Fresno office. There are two wine lovers there as well, and they related this story (which ends in a wine "tasting") today:
A manager in that office, whom we will call Blork for reasons that will become apparent, claims to have family in the wine business in Napa. That he can't recall the name of the winery makes me suspicious...really? If I had relatives in the wine business, they would be my very best friends! In any event, Blork had a birthday recently, and for his birthday, his mysterious family members brought him a barrel of red wine from aforementioned "unknown" winery. They placed it in his garage (or some other part of the house, I wasn't too clear on this) and then all had fun bottling the wine together. Blork claims that the wine has a value of $150 per bottle, and that for his birthday, he was allowed to purchase a case for $200.
Now comes Blork to the Fresno office, relating this story and leaving out what he paid for the wine. He offers to sell said wine to my colleagues for $20 a bottle, which is a fabulous deal if (and only if) the wine is worth $150 a bottle. My colleagues are similar in temprament to me and not opposed to buying a $20 bottle of wine that has a cute story to go along, so they both purchase a bottle. It is instantly noted that the wine has no label on it at all. Again, weird, and how do you know what it is, its age, and so forth? Friend A tucks his away. Friend S decides to sample the wine. Friend A gets an immediate call from Friend S, who laughingly or sobbingly depending on your point of view describes the wine as "cough syrup, really bad cough syrup". Then both friends find out that Blork only paid $16 a bottle and made a profit off the bottles he sold to his coworkers...and thus the wine became known as "Four Prophet" wine.
Today on the way to lunch with Blork and said Friends, the story is related by the Friends with constant interruptions from Blork. Blork vigorously defends his wine's reputation, saying it came from a well-known (but unknown) winery, and that it is worth $150 a bottle. Well of course I have to try it! It so happens that Friend S has tucked his unfortunate bottle into his cabinet at work. He protests that I should not try it, and Friend A insists I must try it just for the experience. A tiny amount is poured into a paper cup - normally I would worry about contaminating the taste of the wine by using a paper cup, but it turns out to be a non-issue.
Four Prophet Wine from Unknown Winery
Blork later told me the wine was a Syrah blend. Ohhhkayyy. The nose was indeed heavy with the scent of cough syrup, an artificial cherry cough syrup at that. And it was indeed laughably bad, a horrific example of Syrah, a ham-fisted, amateurish attempt to coax something fruity from the wine that ended in a romp through Sour Patch Kids land. It was ugly. I've had $2 wines that were far better. The finish was tragically long, with a bitter, sour, and overpoweringly alcoholic burn that lasted until I finally got a glass of water to rinse both palate and throat. It actually tasted like cherry syrup with grain alcohol added, except for that nasty sourness at the end.
To make matters worse, as I was leaving the office today, Blork (not having a clue I'd already tried the wine) caught up with me and again defended the wine, saying he'd given it to other friends and his wife had given it to lawyer friends of hers (as if career makes for a good palate) and they all loved it. Uh huh. Blork ended by saying that when I return, he's going to give me a whole bottle to try for myself.
Oh, goody. Well, at least I will have a bottle of wine with a great story to tell!
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